De-press-ing News

Moving to a new country is like changing to a new job. To be successful, you have to understand and recognize the new culture and find a way to blend with it. I recently repatriated to the UK after living many years in Dubai. I left the UAE determined to approach my new ‘home’ with a fresh perspective and to be as neutral or non judgemental in attitude as possible.

First and foremost I promised myself that I would not discuss the weather or make derogatory comments about it. I knew that this was a tall order since the majority of the population is obsessed with this subject. However, I felt it was a necessary requirement if I was going to settle down quickly and not be emotionally affected by the ‘inconvenient’ downpours or sudden heat waves. So far it has worked miraculously well. I have avoided feeling gloom and doom every time I look out the window and have actually enjoyed the unpredictability of the weather; often pleasantly surprised by what I find and with a healthy respect for the importance of regular rainfall in keeping the grass green and the reservoirs full.

There is, however, something far more difficult to adapt to over here, because it is pervasive and that is the dark cloud of negativity and despair that the media subject us to on a daily basis. It is almost impossible to avoid the damning headlines that scream fear and hopelessness at you from the myriads of free newspapers left all over town by careless (they didn’t pay for it) and thoughtless (we might not like it but why should we bin it) commuters. It’s an almost impossible task to avoid the contamination caused by the media. Trying to stay positive and not be affected by the negative vibes is like swimming against a tide of excrement. A very unpleasant experience at best and if you manage to avoid the worst, it still leaves you feeling tainted and uncomfortable.

How powerful is the mass media in dictating our moods and ultimately our quality of life. Those proponents of free speech and a democratic government will argue that the truth hurts but it has to be faced. I would suggest that there are less painful ways to inform and that a more balanced and measured reporting style might give people hope that they have at least some control over their lives and the economy. Right now the mood in Europe smacks of a Nostradamus prediction or a Shakespearean play – “beware the ides of march”. Give us something positive to hold on to, rather than the diabolical predictions of a heap of irresponsible modern day journalists, who have to write sensational articles to justify their existence.

If I have to sit here waiting for doomsday to come at least help me to believe that I can do something about it. The feeling of the inevitable, the unavoidable causes people to believe that they really have no control over their lives and so they give up without a fight. Feeling helpless in the face of difficulty is the worse emotion. By doing nothing we simply contribute to the early arrival of the very event we wish to avoid. I am not saying that life is all good news and smelling of roses, but every cloud has a silver lining, so let’s see the situation reported from all angles and not the pernicious words of self proclaimed modern day soothsayers.

All that Glitters - The Lure of the Jackpot

The beady-eyed magpie swoops down upon its sparkling prey and soaring high into the trees, returns in triumph to its waiting brood. The young birds greet their benefactor with wide expectant mouths, which swiftly close in sorrowful disappointment. The coin-sized piece of tin foil does not quench their thirst or stave off their hunger. This mistaken treasure is not the feast they were expecting and their disappointment is heard in their loud chirping at the adult forager.

“All that glitters is not gold” – how many times have we heard that warning and yet we still continue to chase that pot of gold. What is it that attracts us? Is it the lure of the fast buck, the possibility of being incredibly successful or the thrill of the risk? Why are we unable to resist the lure of the jackpot, even though we know deep down that it might be a fool’s errand?

Every year millions of people flock to Las Vegas, only to return to their mundane lives without that big win? What brings them back? Their response is varied; the glamour of the city, the lights along the strip, the ringing of the slot machines, access to free shows and international artists, being part of something exciting and last but not least, they might get lucky next time! One thing they have in common is an enduring belief that against all odds they can still do it. Like Walt Disney and Donald Trump who bounced back from bankruptcy to make millions all over again, they believed it was possible. I am tempted to mix metaphors and ask, if ‘All that glitters is not gold’ and ‘Every cloud has a silver lining’, why not go for it like the Las Vegas visitors, because there might be something positive to be gained from the experience.

The very act of taking a gamble, whether it be in the choice of career, an important decision or a toss of the dice, it is a risk. However it turns out, it moves us forward in our lives in some way or another. One could argue that life itself is a risk. Crossing the road, driving a car, taking the bus are all potential hazards. Yet if we fail to negotiate the cross roads of life we run the risk of stagnating.

It seems that man is not alone in his attraction to glitter. Birds, especially Crows and Magpies, will collect silvery objects and use them to build their nests and/or to attract a mate. The Daily Mail reported an experiment with birds and slot machines. It seems that the birds paid little attention to the combinations that regularly paid out a small number of food pellets, in preference for the chance of winning the jackpot. Psychologist’s say that they are mirroring the ‘maladaptive’ behaviour of humans, who will forgo a small but assured reward, hoping against hope for the big jackpot.

Humans tend to wear something bright and glitzy to attract attention. It’s no mistake that most coins in mint condition are bright and shiny. Gold has always been highly valued for barter as something to be prized. Even in today’s credit card currency it is still used to back up the monetary system. In times of uncertainty we tend to fall back on the gold standard. Pop stars and actors frequently adorn themselves with outrageous glitter, even to the extent of including the word in their name i.e. Rock Band ‘Glitterati’ and Gary Glitter, now unfortunately in his demise. The antics of these people have contributed a new word to the English language - Glitterati, meaning ‘wealthy or famous people who conspicuously or ostentatiously attend fashionable events’. The predilection we all seem to have for glitter has spawned a multi million-dollar industry in magazines like Hello and Paris Match, reporting the public and private machinations of the rich and famous.

Most of us, if honest, admit that we would prefer an easy life to that of the typical hard working, poorly paid drudge. Perhaps we are all naturally lazy and any opportunity to get something for nothing, or for very little effort is irresistible. Some Psychologists argue that the human psyche is motivated by bright and glittery things because they cause the body to produce endorphins that make us feel good. Whether it is true or not, there is no doubt that we will continue to chase the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, to dress up in ostentatious clothes when we want to impress, excite or just show-off. It is part of the theatre of life and it may not make the world go around, but it certainly makes it more interesting.

The Five Year Dresser

The latest NLP gathering was a themed event called “Come as you’ll be in 5 years time”. I thought this was a fascinating concept and although I was not able to attend, I was curious as to how I would have dressed had I gone. Given that I am already embarking on a new journey of sorts, I mused about how I would dress to reflect the next stage of my life.

The most obvious choice would be a wardrobe for a cooler climate and the possibility of wearing a different outfit for the four seasons. And yet, it is not only about the clothes – how could I express the personality that I would be presenting in 2016? Who was I planning to be? A wry smile crossed my face at the freedom of painting a new me, with no limitations or preconceptions. Could I become an Agatha Christie eccentric or perhaps I could morph into middle age with elegance and charm aka Audrey Hepburn or Amelia Earhart. The latter seemed more appealing. It would definitely attract more admiring glances, providing I could lose enough weight to pull it off!

I quickly dismissed both ideas as superficial because I was working from the outside in, rather than the other way around. It’s like setting goals. One needs to have an overall vision first before working on the details. So what was the vision for my future life? Sketching in the details I could see myself in a more public arena, promoting my book, running my workshops, attending literary events and playing amateur golf. Not much to work with, I sniggered. Seriously, whom did I know that I could model? If I at least looked the part, I might be believable and when we ‘act as if we already have something’, it’s amazing how that very thing seems to manifest. That thought made me feel quite excited and motivated – so far so good – a first step in the right direction according to the manifesting gurus.

I could sense a more elegant me, coming into my feminine essence and dressing to impress. Logging into the internet I googled “female author style icon’ and waited for the results. What a disappointment – all young punks – nothing in my age group. It seems that the last real era of true style icons was in the 1950s and they were mostly movie stars. I’d already nailed Audrey so tell me what’s new!

Googling again I changed the search to “elegant presenter”. The results did not give me any visual ideas, but I did discover something more interesting. Apparently we are considered elegant when we present ideas that are true to our values and beliefs i.e. being congruent wins kudos. Did that mean I could dress any which way and still be admired? I knew that wouldn’t work since I wanted to not only feel elegant but look it. One last chance at the net – where is that icon for me to model? Holding my breath I googled ‘Top Ten Authors 2010” and discovered that they all looked quite uninspiring, except for the obvious makeover from Women’s Own. I guess I will stick with my original plan – eat your heart out Audrey!

Janet Deeb

Cat up a Tree

It costs our Fire Services thousands of pounds each year to rescue domestic cats that have found themselves stuck up a tree. There are literally millions of such incidents around the world, but it is not only the cats that are to blame. In a recent article in the Metro (ref: Metro.co.uk) it was revealed that:

“Fed-up firefighters are threatening to charge to rescue cats from trees, free dogs from holes and help overweight people out of their homes. In six months, the Lancashire Fire Service had calls from 40 people stuck in their baths, 6 trapped in phone boxes and 8 who could not get out of their chairlifts. 13 youngsters got their heads stuck in railings and 15 were stranded in trees.”

To those of us who are not involved personally, we might find these incidents quite comic, but for the unfortunate people/animals directly involved, it is no joke. As for the fire services, such rescue operations are often hugely expensive and time consuming.

What is the reason for this strange phenomenon? Why would a cat attempt to climb a tree and then be too afraid to come back down? Why do some people have such poor spatial awareness that they can’t tell if the bath is too small or recognize that they are too fat to fit in the lift? Surely there is something built into the feline or human DNA to prevent us from exposing ourselves to such foolhardy situations or choices?

Admittedly there is little excuse for such human stupidity, though we all suffer from lack of common sense at some time or other in our lives. However, if we give ourselves time/space to think before we act, theoretically our finely tuned mental faculties should help us to make wiser choices. Unfortunately, we rarely have that time or space. The point is that when we are under severe pressure i.e. being chased, (aka colleagues after our job at work, too much work, competition etc.) or when distracted by a tasty reward i.e. the bird, (aka material gain or status) are we ever able to make intelligent choices? Choices that truly serve us, help us to be fulfilled and give us courage to climb the tree of life/career, or to come down to earth and move in another direction?

As human beings we at least have the privilege of being able to learn from our mistakes. We can do this by looking at the past, analyzing its success or failure and making a choice as to whether it is wise to follow the same path. Alternatively we can watch what others have done and choose to do it differently or even improve on their performance.

It is not difficult to see what drives a cat up a tree. It is either trying to catch a bird or being chased up there by a dog or other predator. Once up the tree, its innate sense of self-preservation kicks in and any movement from below, whether it be friendly or threatening, causes it to climb even higher. The higher it climbs, the greater the fear, until the cat becomes frozen to the spot and is unable to go anywhere.

When you look at your career, are you behaving like that cat up the tree? Blindly chasing after things, money or status, without really considering the consequences of your actions. Are you so far up that you are afraid to change direction in your life for fear of losing what you have, (aka things, money, status) even if it is not what you really want? Are you using (losing?) all your energy to fight the competition, with sleepless nights, fearing the worst, yet refusing to change your tactics or position? Is your life or career on hold, because you are afraid to move? Ask yourself, is it wise or even sane to continue doing the same thing, even though it gives you poor results? Why would you want to remain in a state of immobility, when any movement or change in behaviour could give you something better?

Through the powerful tools of NLP we help you to start moving, to recognize your strengths and discover what behaviour no longer serves you. We show you how to make positive choices for a more successful life style and/or career. We help you to remove your head from the railings and take a good look around you, so that you can see and do what is best for you and your life. You learn how to become free and fearless like the wild cat!

Janet Deeb
From an idea by Carol at Matrix

Reasons to be Cheerful

They called it the “Wedding of the Century”. Prince Harry said his mother would have been proud. The crowds in the streets were jubilant. The reporters were asking obvious questions, but we wanted to hear the answers. The people were there to celebrate, to forget the unhappiness and mediocrity of life, to be part of the Royal festivities.

You only had to look at the faces of the people in the crowd to know that they were indeed jubilant. Some of them had camped out for 3 days to get a front seat to view the Royal Couple. There were people of all ages and dominions, some had even travelled across the Atlantic to be there for this momentous occasion. Men and women, boys and girls, all wanted to be part of history, to be able to say that “I was there”.

The television programs began broadcasting from 8 a.m. and were still replaying the Royal scenes at midnight. It was as if the rest of the world no longer existed. Other news was put on hold, whilst we saw umpteen replays of the day’s events. It was one of the biggest and probably best publicity coups for the United Kingdom, since Charles and Diana’s wedding in 1981. Comparisons were naturally made between the two events and the most obvious conclusion was that William and Kate were very much a ‘couple’. Katherine, despite her ‘Middle Class’ background, carried herself with dignity and grace. She demonstrated a confidence and air of Royalty that certainly distinguished her from many a thoroughbred royal.

I was on a train when they were walking down the aisle. Watching it all from my friend’s iphone, we suddenly found ourselves surrounded by strangers. They crowded round the miniscule screen and we all laughed and joked together. Such a thing is normally unheard of in London, where you dare not speak to strangers for fear of being labelled as weird. It was a wonderful moment of togetherness and I will never forget it.

Everyone seemed to be caught up in the moment. There were organized and impromptu street parties all over the country. The cafes, restaurants and pubs were full to bursting as people found an excuse to celebrate. Even the most cynical could not fail to be caught up in the euphoria of the day.

How strange it is that we find so few excuses to celebrate life. How important it is to feel those good vibrations and to do it without fear, retribution or mockery. On the contrary there are too many opportunities to be sad, mad or just plane indifferent. And yet, such negative emotions only serve to divide humanity and make us more suspicious of each other.

Given the opportunity, all people like to rise to an occasion. I remember in the nineteen-sixties how the campaign in London, called “I’m backing Britain” took off in Carnaby Street. It became quite contagious. People were fed up with the negative labels that were being directed at the U.K. and they decided to fight back. It spawned an industry clothed in symbolism with the Union Jack prominently featured on T-Shirts, Crockery and anything that could sell the idea that Britain was great again.

To those people in the crowd and the hundreds of international TV reporters who broadcast the good news around the world, I say a loud BRAVO. Let’s find reasons to celebrate more often. They are good for morale and show that we can indeed be happy and united in the support of each other.

The Misnomer of Ownership

The biggest problem we have in this world is our concept of ownership. We believe that once we have bought something, we own it exclusively and it belongs to us forever. If anyone tries to take it from us, we are fiercely protective. We remain that way until we decide it is time to let go and for some of us that might take a lifetime.

Ancient civilisations like the American Indians and Australian Aborigines have a completely different attitude. They live in close harmony with nature and respect all its creatures. Their nomadic habits mean that they do not stay in one place long enough to build lasting attachments. They are simply guests on the earth, ‘borrowing’ the resources that nature generously provides until they move on to the next ‘provider’ or water hole. For that reason they do not even have a word for ‘own’ in their vocabulary and cannot understand the concept of ownership. Consequently they don’t spend too long feeling sorrowful when they leave something behind, because it wasn’t theirs to take in the first place!

Conversely, the majority of humans in the ‘modern’ world attach so much importance to owning ‘material things’ that they have developed a huge fear of losing ‘their’ belongings. This fear is so great that it is not uncommon for man to spend a lifetime collecting as much as he/she can so as to avert any possibility of lack and to ward off this huge fear of loss. Of course, we all know that eventually when we die we cannot take anything with us. All those possessions are left behind and we return from whence we came as naked as the day we were born.

This desire to be the owner of things should not be confused with the human need for self-preservation or basic survival. We all need to feel protected and safe but somehow we have become confused. It seems we have developed a limiting belief that the more we surround ourselves with things we own, the bigger our illusion of safety and security becomes. It is no wonder that we are afraid to let go of what we have and yet that is the only way to make a change.

Like the story of the teacup as told by Bruce Lee in his book “Artist of Life’. There was a learned man who went to a Zen master to inquire about Zen. As the Zen master talked, the learned man would frequently interrupt him with remarks like ‘Oh yes, we have that too’, and so forth. Finally the Zen master stopped talking and began to serve tea to the learned man; however he kept on pouring and the teacup overflowed. ‘Enough! No more can go into the cup!’ the learned man interrupted. ‘Indeed, I see,’ answered the Zen master. ‘If you do not first empty your cup, how can you taste my cup of tea?’

When we let go of something old, we make room for new things to come into our life. In the same way that nomadic tribes could move from one place to another, without attachment, we could learn to let go of old habits, old possessions, old beliefs and move on to new experiences, new ways of living. In NLP we can easily identify these negative habits or behaviours that are holding us back from growing and developing. We are able to reframe loss and let go of the things that do not serve us, so that we can move on to a more positive and beneficial existence.

In the Zen philosophy of non-attachment, we learn to accept whatever life brings, without fear or distress or resistance. It is our attachment to things, our resistance to change and our refusal to let go that causes so much misery. If we weren’t so paranoid about holding on to the status quo, to what we have acquired, earned, bought, learned, received, etc., we would be less worried about losing it. As human beings it is inevitable that we will experience the emotion of loss and it is important to acknowledge that pain. However, the emotion is transitory and will pass provided we do not resist the change and allow the natural rhythm of life to ebb and flow.

When we recognize that we have become inordinately attached to something e.g. our books, car, clothes, etc. and we finally let go, we become aware of a discernable lightness, dare I say, relief. How much time and energy is wasted stubbornly holding on to old beliefs and arguing about them! Remember people once believed that the world was flat! I always thought I was a model of minimalistic living, until recently when I decided to move. How I agonized over what to take with me and what to leave behind! The things I had owned over the years had somehow become a cloak, a mantel for my life – they almost defined who I had become. What would happen if I shook them off, where would I be?

Is it our lack of faith or trust in a benign universe that causes us to hold on to the status quo? Or perhaps it is a lack of faith in our own ability to find something better, to replace what we have accumulated or become over time with something else? Have you noticed how peer pressure keeps us stuck in the old ways? How uncomfortable others become when we change our mind, our beliefs or lifestyle, even our structure of living.

Dr. Wayne Dyer tells a story about the time he went to a local radio station to be interviewed. He had been there many times before and was therefore well known by the staff. On this particular occasion he noticed that everyone was looking very gloomy and barely spoke to him. When he asked them what was the matter he discovered that they had been made redundant. His response was ‘how wonderful, you can turn your loss into an opportunity for change and move on to pastures new.’ At first they were shocked by his comment but when he questioned them more deeply many of them admitted that they could now pursue their dreams and that their forced redundancy had made them reevaluate their lives.

Most people do not like to let go of their comfortable existence, but it is the very act of discomfort that moves us forward in positive and interesting ways. Likewise we often find it hard to accept new ideas, new concepts because society teaches us to play it safe and follow the herd. Yet, when we make those changes, when we change our mind about life, we find that life changes its mind about us.

Janet Deeb
http://www.blazelightaround.com
from an idea by Carol at Matrix Training
http://www.matrix-training.com

Fly Me I'm Fragrant

Years ago there was an advertising campaign for a famous American airline and the slogan went something like ‘Fly me I’m [girl’s name]”. There were posters everywhere with a gorgeous woman plastered all over them. It was a hugely successful campaign and 10CC, a popular group at the time, even had a hit single with the name, ‘Fly me, I’m Mandy’. It was the start of a series of publicity stunts that attempted to link beautiful women with a desire to fly on a particular airline or buy a particular product. The female community may not have been amused but they could not deny that it worked.

It seems that the human race is pre-programmed to chase after beauty. No matter how much we refuse to follow that particular dictate, it is an inevitable human reaction. In the case of the ‘Fly me, I’m Mandy’ airline, the days of nubile young air hostesses has long since passed, though who would dare to comment! ‘I’m ugly, fly me’ does not have the same attraction and would probably incur a law suite from the Society for the Protection of some minority group or other.

From the time we are babies, the beautiful ones learn fast that a pretty face gets them everywhere. Only when we mature do we practice not to recoil from ugliness and discover that beauty is often only skin deep.

Another thing that the advertising moguls prey on is our sense of smell. Apparently we spend billions of dollars every year on fragrances to disguise our own (apparently) unappealing pong. They do everything to convince us that wearing X brand will make us beautiful and rich with a zillion admirers. I am rather surprised that the airlines haven’t picked up on that particular selling point, or did I miss it?

Instead of ‘Fly me I’m Mandy’ we could have ‘Fly me I’m fragrant’. Now that would definitely interest the more sensitive travellers amongst us. Whenever I fly I seem to attract the most unsavory companions, who either sneeze and cough all over me for 7 grueling hours or inflict their own personal aroma on my personal space. It is a most infuriating experience and one that seems to replicate itself with alarming regularity. So much so that I have changed my pre-flight prayer to ‘thank you for my safe and fragrant flight’. I even fantasize about a ‘cleaner air’ experience. Imagine airlines that employ ‘fragrant guards’ with sniffer dogs to ensure that no one is allowed on board unless they pass the pong test! Imagine, “Fly Chanel” or “Virgin Atlantic by Coco”. The possibilities are endless.

Seriously, though, the aroma of a place can have a big impact on our enjoyment or motivation to return for a second visit. I wonder if governments take that into consideration when planning their tourist campaigns. Inadequately purified irrigation water has sent many an inquisitive walker running for cover. I wonder how much we unconsciously anchor our experiences through the local smells?

After years of living in the Middle East I had become quite used to the dusty air, but did not notice its unique smell until I returned from the wetter climes of Europe. When walking around the souks in Dubai, we are often subjected to the strong smell of Arabic Oudh or whiffs of passing mothballs. I presume that both aromas serve to disguise other unpleasant smells or in the case of the latter to prevent moths from eating our clothes. However, I think someone should mention that they also keep humans away!

On a more positive note, let me come into contact with the local ‘Ghawa’ coffee with top notes of cardamom, and I am instantly hooked. Similarly, I have friends who cannot walk past a donut shop without having to pay a visit. Perhaps it’s the cinnamon flavouring that does it? Whatever your particular fix, next time you venture out into the wide world pay attention to what your nose is telling you. There is a lot more behind our odour detector than you know.

Janet Deeb
http://www.blazelightaround.com
from an idea by Carol at Matrix Training
http://www.matrix-training.com

The Winter Solstice

The winter solstice marks the beginning of winter and the longest night. It is a time when the sun is at its lowest in the sky, so days become shorter and nights correspondingly longer. In days gone by, it was considered by many societies as a time of celebration and feasting. In temperate climates the winter solstice was the last opportunity to gather together and have fun before the austerity of the winter months set in. Animals would be slaughtered, so they would not have to be fed during winter and this provided a rare opportunity to eat fresh meat. The majority of wine and beer was finally fermented and ready for drinking at this time, so there were plenty of provisions during the celebrations.

Ancient civilisations, as long as 3000 years ago, recognized the significance of the winter solstice i.e. the primary axes of Stonehenge in UK and Newgrange in Ireland were built to capture the rays of the winter solstice during sunrise and sunset.

Various cultural mythologies and traditions have arisen around this time and are still practiced i.e. Christmas day co-incides with the Roman winter solstice, where good deeds and gift giving is commonly expected. The most widespread Scottish custom is the practice of ‘first footing’, which starts immediately after midnight on the first day of the New Year. Tradition requires that the first person (usually tall and dark haired) to cross the threshold of a friend or neighbour’s house, bring with them a gift such as salt (less common today), coal, shortbread or whisky and black bun (a fruit pudding). This is intended as a symbol of good luck for the householder in the New Year.

Another ceremony performed by the Inca priests was the tying of the sun. In Machu Picchu there is still a large column of stone called an ‘Intihuatana’, meaning ‘hitching post of the sun’. The ceremony to ‘tie the sun’ to the stone was to prevent the sun from escaping.

According to Iranian mythology, Mithra was born at the end of this night after the long-expected defeat of darkness against light. ‘Shab-e Chelleh’ is now an important social occasion, when family and friends get together for fun and merriment. Different kinds of dried fruits, nuts, seeds and fresh winter fruits are consumed. This is reminiscence of the ancient feasts, where they prayed to the deities to ensure the protection of the winter crops.

Nowadays, most people, or certainly those in the Western hemisphere, treat December as a time to wind down from their hectic pace of work and focus instead on festive celebrations. They take this opportunity to spend time with their family and friends in very sociable gatherings. In ancient times the months that followed the winter solstice brought fear and frequently starvation. Therefore, their celebrations prior to the onset of winter were considered a last chance to celebrate their lives in case they did not survive the harsh winter.

Although few people in the modern Western world have such fears, December has become known as a period of over indulgence and excess, before January and February herald in a more frugal period. It is also an important time of retrospection, where we consider the past year, how we have faired in business and relationships and where we are going with our lives. The media as well as social pressures often cause us to have great expectations in December. These are, by their nature, frequently unrealistic and usually lead to disappointment and feelings of failure and remorse. Hence the New Year can bring with it huge disillusionment in terms of relationships and personal satisfaction.

January has not surprisingly become known as the ‘sad’ month. There is a general perception that there are no more celebrations, we have spent all our money and there is nothing to look forward to except cold weather and dark days. We didn’t meet the love of our life or worse still we broke up with them! This can be quite a challenge for those who are not naturally optimistic or have nothing else to focus on i.e. the unemployed or those with no family or friends for support. For such people, a coach or therapist is very beneficial. They help us to refocus our attention and recharge our batteries, so that we can see the light at the end of the tunnel.

On the other hand the first month of the New Year is a time for reining in not only our wallets, but also our girth. Healthy resolutions and a more balanced diet are the order of the day and magazines are full of suggestions for a new and improved you. This may all be symbolic, but it still reflects the original sentiments of the ancients at this time of year, where there was traditionally less to eat and a general lack of resources. Those of a more cynical nature have long ceased to pay serious attention to these seasonal practices, though they can’t fail to be drawn in by the global talk of change and the unmistakable feel of the New Year.

As long as we recognize the purpose behind this time of the year and take it as part of the natural rhythm of life, we can accept its ebbs and flows. It is pointless trying to resist or even resent it. Attempting to work hard when everyone else is slowing down is frankly non productive and usually ineffective. Take some time off, slow down and celebrate with the others. Take stock of what you have achieved and where you have been going all year. Give yourself space to let your thoughts and dreams percolate into something fresh and new for the coming season. We were all born to grow and to change. Let the New Year bring in those changes. Be courageous, think out of the box and turn yourself into something new and exciting in 2011.

Janet Deeb
Picture & information courtesy of Wikipedia